Bob Garon's Confessions Of Blatant Heartfelt Honesty Inspired By Third Format

I'm taking a HUGE chance at expressing myself in this blog post to all of you. The chance I take is being misunderstood and/or misinterpreted. That happens quite a bit where reading is concerned if the author is not fully known to his or her audience. It is then up to the author to express themselves the best they can and know how. I did that here and hope I did it effectively, but as a human I don't do things perfectly and would like feedback. There is a comment section at the bottom of every post and if this post upsets you please write a comment because my intentions are definitely NOT that. If you are upset then that means you did not interpret me accurately. If you understand my words you will clearly see that I fully open my heart and mind to you for a brief moment becoming vulnerable. It is in that vulnerability that I truly express my thoughts.

The following was mentioned and asked of me by one of my pastors, Jeremy Jernigan, over on the Third Format Blog here:

"I love when people challenge indifference, especially in a spiritual context. So here's one to get us thinking.

'The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity.' George Bernard Shaw

Do you agree? Is indifference really worse than hate?"

I find that my struggle is the mental judgment of people. I have developed almost this sixth sense of how to read people and to do so very quickly after meeting them.

Based upon my initial feelings and ongoing continued perception of them based upon their own actions/inactions I derive a mental concept of who they are and then maintain that mental judgment. The longer I know them, they may do things that cause me to keep stacking judgments and then each time I think of them, interact with them, or simply observe them the judgments are there and so therefore my overall opinion of them may or may not be a positive one based solely on all of this- which was again their actions/inactions to begin with.

Ok so to answer the question I wanted to provide that background so you can have a bit of an insight into my people perception process. Ultimately I do not, and never will, hate anyone. What happens in my own heart is an extremely deep desire to help people become physically and mentally stronger in themselves than they already are. This causes me to have a mental attachment that, can at times be quite exhausting and which can or cannot, entirely depend on exactly who they are to me in my life, be a positive or negative experience.

Whether any of this makes sense to you I'm not sure so I will put it into more practical terms.

As most of you know, I am a fitness coach and run my own Kettlebell Boot Camp in the evenings in Gilbert, Arizona at Discovery Park. My goal is to help people get fit, stay fit and live longer, healthier lives. Well not everyone wants to do this. That is to be understood, BUT to me when I see that I think in my mind: "why not?". Why don't they want to take their health, which is sometimes the only thing they CAN control in their lives, and do whatever it takes to make it the absolute best that it can be. Now of course I understand that most folks aren't going to prioritize their bodies, health, and exercise as I would like. So grace is definitely in order. Even though I understand that it is a difficult challenge for me to see people try to get the quick fix and magic cure all to obesity, deconditioning, and any overall health conditions when in FACT these can most always be remedied by good nutrition and exercise.

Now this will not ever be accomplished by what the government wants and the content that's put into all these magazines weekly and monthly editions regarding nutrition as they see it. No, but it will definitely come through the hard work of everyone who actually WANTS to become mentally and physically stronger. It is not something that is easy to achieve for if it was more people would already be there. For me it's hard to sit back and watch people try to do EVERYTHING that is opposite of what they should be doing. They almost run from what it is that will truly give them what they both desire and need. The formula is simple and it's told to us our entire lives: proper diet that's a lifestyle and everyday activity and exercise. Of course that goes much, much deeper, but the essence is clear. The way it works is first wanting and then executing into actions.

My attachment comes when the 'want' begins and I then automatically do everything I know how to, throw my entire knowledge and self at the person, and they simply expect changes because of their want. Well it's a struggle for me to disengage myself from the emotional side of helping people connect to their dreams when the end result is within my power to partner with them to get there.

So to circle back to the qualm of being indifferent or hating as a disservice to humanity I would have to say that yes indifference is quite the quandary. When you hate at least you will know without a doubt whether you like or dislike that person. The only issue there is then why did the hate begin in the first place and can it be resolved and removed. Indifference, on the other hand, can be a much more sticky dilemma in that people will always fail themselves and fail us. We're human and if we allow those failures to affect us there lies the problem because we will then always have one. The problem lies within ourselves.

R. Garon

Robert Garon is a Masters level pastoral counseling student at Liberty University. He and his wife reside in the suburbs of Chicago where they, together, lead a marriage enhancement and discipleship group called Re|engage at their church. Robert also regularly leads short-term mission teams, both internationally and domestically, as well as a weekly men’s community group.

On THE mission making God known by helping others thrive and flourish for His kingdom!